How Being Wired for Survival Makes Us Unhappy + 7 Easy Fixes
Keep reading to find out how being wired for survival makes us unhappy + 7 easy fixes.
Here’s what you’ll GAIN from this article:
Learn how being wired for survival makes us focus on the negative.
7 gratitude practices that work.
2 resources.
Let’s get to it!
WIRED FOR SURVIVAL
Our brains are hardwired to scan and detect threats, which means we’re constantly on the lookout for everything and anything that could go wrong or hurt us.
Survival is important. In fact, it’s our most basic human need.
But left to its own devices, our brain runs in default survival mode even from the comforts of a safe, supported, and secure environment. Which means we’re attuned to notice the negative even when it’s not beneficial to do so.
This is why a daily gratitude practice is so important.
Our brains are well-oiled, efficient machines when it comes to noticing the negative. But they need a little help when it comes to identifying the positive.
We can reprogram our brains to notice more of the positive by implementing a daily gratitude practice.
7 GRATITUDE PRACTICES THAT WORK
Get ready. We’re about to drop the gratitude goodness on you! 🙏🏻
Below you’ll find our top seven gratitude practices. We’ve got you covered whether you have one minute or one hour to express gratitude each day.
Gratitude Journaling
Hey. No eye rolls, please. We know you know about gratitude journaling, but let’s start with the basics and get more creative from there.
A gratitude journal is exactly what it sounds like: A journal in which you write down things you’re grateful for.
How to start a gratitude journal in 3 easy steps:
Pick your medium. This can be an actual physical journal and pen (our recommendation), a computer-based word doc, or even an app on your phone.
Pick a time. When are you going to write in your gratitude journal? First thing in the morning (our recommendation)? Before you go to bed? Every day? Every week day? On Saturdays only?
Set parameters. Are you going to journal for 5 minutes? 10 minutes? Are you going to write down five separate things you’re grateful for? Are you going to write down one thing you’re grateful for with five accompanying reasons why (our recommendation)? e.g., I’m grateful for clean, running water because it allows me to stay hydrated, shower, wash dishes, water my vegetable garden, and brush my teeth.
Rampage of Appreciation
This gratitude practice is from Abraham Hicks.
A “rampage of appreciation” is a stream-of-consciousness practice in which you list everything you appreciate in the here and now without reacting or editing.
We find this is easiest to do on a computer in a word document. That way, you can easily capture everything that comes to mind.
Abraham recommends working up to 20 minutes a day, but even just a minute-long daily rampage is effective.
Gracious Pauses
This is our go-to for busy times.
Set an alert on your phone, computer, or smartwatch for some point in the middle of the day (or multiple times per day if you can).
Pause, close your eyes, place your hands over your heart, and experience gratitude for the present moment for 30 seconds to a minute.
You can even send your gratitude to someone who’s been on your mind. Imagine your heart radiating love, peace, and appreciation and send it directly to that person.
Gratitude Statements
Much like intentions, gratitude statements can be used to ground and center us in a grateful headspace.
For instance, you might write out five gratitude statements for the month and read them silently or aloud each morning.
This practice can be particularly powerful when it comes to self-love and body image.
You might consider standing in front of a mirror each morning and reading your gratitude statements aloud to yourself.
Here are a handful that Ashley is currently using:
Legs, thank you for your strength. Thank you for carrying me each and every day.
Eyes, thank you for your compassion. Thank you for allowing me to connect with others on a deeper level.
Tummy, thank you for your ability to transform food into nourishment that fuels me.
Feet, thank you for your resilience. Thank you for allowing me to walk and feel the earth beneath you.
Lips, thank you for your courage. Thank you for allowing me to speak my mind in an empathic, compassionate way.
Mindful Presence
According to Donald Altman, psychotherapist and former Buddhist Monk, a mindful mind is a grateful mind.
A mind that tunes into the intricate details of each moment is a mind that accepts and appreciates “what is”.
Using this principle as a springboard, we can practice gratitude any time of day by being fully present for whatever it is we’re doing in that moment.
Take washing the dishes, for example.
We can mindfully (and therefore gratefully) do the dishes by experiencing the full range of sounds, sensations, scents, and sights that are part of the dishwashing experience.
The warm water washing over our hands. The calming smell of our lavender dish soap. The cloud of bubbles billowing up as we scrub. The trickling noise the water makes as it flows from dishes to sink.
When we’re fully immersed in an experience, it’s almost impossible not to be grateful for it.
1-Minute Happy Dance
Need we say more? Pause, turn on your favorite feel-good song, and dance. it. out. for a minute (or more)!
While you’re dancing…
Thank your body for its ability to move. Thank the song’s creator for being brave enough to put that masterpiece out into the world. Thank the ground beneath you for supporting your (wild) dance moves.
Unexpected Thanks
Move out of your comfort zone and unexpectedly thank someone. Be it a stranger or someone you know.
Does a coworker constantly go above and beyond in meetings?
Does your husband take out the trash like a pro?
Did you witness a stranger committing a random act of kindness (e.g., picking up trash in the street)?
No matter how small the act or how silly the compliment may seem, share your gratitude freely with those who surround you.
They’ll appreciate you for it, and you’ll feel good sharing.
INTENTION
I notice the good that surrounds me each and every day.
DO THIS TODAY
Pick one of the practices above and give it a try.
WRITING PROMPT
Write down one thing you’re grateful for and five reasons why.
2 RESOURCES
How to be Grateful with a Gun to Your Head with Byron Katie (This is deep and complex—please, watch the ENTIRE video and do your own research on Byron before judging, please. This is something she’s actually experienced in real life.)