The 3 Mirrors of Perception
If you’ve heard people say things like “If you don’t like your life, look at yourself because your life is just showing you who you are,” and have felt dissatisfied with this shame-inducing explanation, keep reading. There’s a whole lot more to the concept of ‘spiritual mirrors’ than this one limiting idea.
“Your perception of me is a reflection of you; My reaction to you is an awareness of me.”
One of the themes I’ve regularly returned to in self-reflection this year has been the idea of spiritual mirrors. No pun intended. :)
Are you familiar with this concept? It’s sometimes referred to as the ‘mirror of the moment’.
The common understanding of spiritual mirrors is that what we experience day-to-day reflects back to us that which we are.
For instance, if we wake up in a grumpy state, we tend to attract unwanted nuisances and other negative experiences into our reality that day.
And then there are those days when we fly high and all sorts of beautiful serendipities and synchronicities are reflected back to us.
BUT...
Something has always felt off or incomplete about this idea to me.
The idea that:
If you’re angry, you’ll receive anger.
If you’re sad, you’ll receive sadness.
If you’re happy, you’ll receive happiness.
And if you draw some terrible, unwanted experience into your life, welp, so be it. You manifested that sh*t.
There’s something so inherently shame-inducing about this narrow definition of spiritual mirrors. It lacks compassion, and offers a rather shallow, overly simplified explanation of the very complex experience of being human.
Because of this, I’ve kept constant watch for alternatives to this one-tracked perspective.
I sighed with relief a few years back when I discovered a teaching that suggested that we each have two points of attraction/mirroring—one through our mind (ego) and one through the higher self. You can read more about that here.
The idea removes some of those shameful, blaming feelings about attracting experiences that are deemed ‘unwanted’ by the mind because it offers the alternative explanation that perhaps the higher self has a far greater plan for us in those moments.
And yet I still felt dissatisfied and as if some big piece of the puzzle was missing.
Then, one fateful night earlier this year while watching a show on Gaia, I finally stumbled upon an explanation that rang true.
THE 3 MIRRORS OF PERCEPTION
In his show, Missing Links (S3:E4), Gregg Braden talks about his own discontent with the ‘mirror of the moment’ theory that stemmed from the new age movement of the ‘80s.
He highlights the cruel undertones of this limited perspective of spiritual mirrors, noting that under its spell people tend to say things like, “If you don’t like your life, look at yourself because your life is just showing you who you are.”
Yuck.
He notes that sometimes this is true—that our experiences merely reflect back to us that which we are. But goes on to propose that the ‘mirror of the moment’ is actually only one of three distinct mirrors of perception.
His expansion upon the spiritual mirror concept blew my mind open, and I hope it does the same for you.
Let’s take a look at the three mirrors of perception according to Gregg Braden…
MIRROR 1: ‘I AM’
The first mirror is the most commonly known of the spiritual mirrors. It is the mirror that reflects back what we are.
Through it, the experiences we face mirror what we believe, think, feel, and do.
If mirror one had an intention, it would be: I experience that which I am.
MIRROR 2: ‘I JUDGE’
The second mirror reflects back what we judge.
For instance, if you value integrity, honesty, and morals above all else but find yourself frequently encountering people who are untrustworthy and devoid of a moral compass, you’re experiencing the second mirror.
Although you can’t see yourself in the experiences (MIRROR 1), your judgments are being reflected back to you (MIRROR 2).
The second mirror shows us where we need to soften or release our judgments.
If mirror two had an intention, it would be: I experience that which I judge.
MIRROR 3: ‘I AM MISSING’
This is perhaps the most interesting and powerful mirror of all.
The third mirror reflects back what we’ve given away, had taken away, or are missing.
We come into this world whole and complete and yet through the years, we give pieces of ourselves away (both consciously and unconsciously) to compromise, to keep the peace, to fit in, to be accepted, to be loved, etc.
Little by little we drain ourselves of our true nature as we bend, mould, soften, and shape ourselves to fit the desires of others.
Braden offers this example:
If you’ve ever felt powerfully attracted to another person despite being in a committed, happy relationship, this is an example of the third mirror at play. The person you’re attracted to has the quality that you’ve lost, given away, or had taken away.
We typically don’t allow ourselves to fully examine the ‘why’ behind these feelings because our culture says it’s wrong to have them. But if we did, we’d be shown what we’ve given away.
We long to be complete and so we subconsciously search for the pieces of ourselves that we’ve lost throughout life in hopes of making ourselves whole again.
This is why opposites often attract. Because the other person’s qualities fill in the gaps and spaces within us that have been created through this process of giving away.
In romantic relationships, we feel strongly attracted as our partners reflect back to us what we’ve been missing until we begin to reclaim those parts of ourselves.
And when this reclamation happens, the attraction in a stable, committed relationship may fade or soften. Not because of anything the other person has done but because we’ve finally rediscovered that missing piece of ourselves within them and reclaimed it.
The third mirror isn’t limited to just romantic attraction.
Think of a time when you’ve been powerfully drawn to or magnetized by someone in a platonic way. Social media actually offers us many third-mirror opportunities as we form bonds of admiration to those we only know from a distance.
Perhaps we admire someone on Instagram for their bravery, courage, and candid authenticity to the point of idolization.
Without awareness of the third mirror, our feelings may appear to be all about them when in actuality, we’re being shown something powerful about ourselves: That we’ve given away or subdued our own bravery and courage and need to reclaim it.
Braden suggests that when we find ourselves powerfully drawn to someone—romantically or otherwise—we ask ourselves this question:
What is it that I see in this person or sense in this person that I’ve lost, given away, or had taken from me by those who had power over me?
The answer will illuminate what it is you need to reclaim within yourself.
If mirror three had an intention, it would be: I experience that which I am missing and that which I need to reclaim.
DECIPHERING THE MIRROR OF THE MOMENT
When you find yourself wondering what the people and experiences you’re currently facing are trying to teach you by way of reflection, ask yourself these questions:
Is this experience/person reflecting back to me what I am?
Is this experience/person reflecting back to me what I judge?
Is this experience/person reflecting back to me what I’m missing?
When done honestly and humbly, this simple stream of reflective questioning is powerful and illuminating.
We can then use the information we receive to embrace or adjust (MIRROR 1), release (MIRROR 2), or reclaim (MIRROR 3), depending on which mirror is at play.
INTENTION
I examine reality and all of its mirrors openly and compassionately.
INTUITIVE WRITING PROMPT
Think of a person you’ve recently been strongly attracted to or magnetized by. Write to your intuition* (higher self) to answer the following question.
What is it that I see in this person or sense in this person that I’ve lost, given away, or had taken from me by those who had power over me?
*If you’re unsure how to write to your intuition, read this post to learn how to access your intuition in 5 easy steps.
RESOURCE
VIDEO: Living in a Reflected Reality by Gregg Braden
