The #1 Rule to Achieve Your Dreams
Do you have big dreams but are unsure how to achieve them or where to start? In this article, we share the #1 rule to manifest your dreams and a fail-proof way to determine the most important first step on the path toward achievement.
“Making a choice that is 1 percent better or 1 percent worse seems insignificant in the moment, but over the span of moments that make up a lifetime these choices determine the difference between who you are and who you could be.”
here’s what you’ll learn from this article:
Learn how to show up for your dreams.
Learn why you must start before you’re ready.
Find out the game-changing habit all successful people share and how to develop it in your own life.
Let’s get to it!
WEEKLY CHECK-IN
Last week, we learned why comfort zones are cozy but unfulfilling. We also shared the difference between between stress and growth-oriented discomfort.
The key difference being a feeling of misaligned chronic stress vs. energizing expansion.
Have you been able to notice ways your comfort zone might be holding you back?
If so, comment below to let us know your experience. We love hearing from you.
Once you recognize the boundaries of your comfort zone, you can focus on pushing the bounds outward to realize your dreams.
SHOW UP FOR YOUR DREAMS
Zig Ziglar has a quote you’ve probably heard many times before. It goes like this:
“If you can dream it, you can achieve it.”
While we love this quote’s inherent positivity, it feels a bit lofty and untouchable. It excludes the messy, fear-facing steps that every human must take on the journey between dreaming and achieving.
And it makes dreamers (who we all are) out to be heroes.
Rising to the level of a hero is a lot of pressure, is it not? A hero is fearless. But every dreamer has fears.
And so, when we recently stumbled upon a similar but oh-so-different quote from Goethe, its meaning struck a chord deep within us.
Here’s the quote:
“Whatever you can do, or dream you can do, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.”
We envision the Universe whispering to us through this quote, saying something along the lines of…
“Listen, you don’t have to know exactly how you’re going to get to the place where your dreams are. We’ll take care of the details. But you do have to show us you’re committed by taking action without immediate gratification or reward. Take one brave step in the direction of your dreams today. Then do it again tomorrow. And the day after. Set aside your excuses and show up consistently in your actions, and we’ll reward you with guidance.”
It removes the intangible heroic leap, from dreamed to achieved, and suggests something less exciting but totally within reach:
Sit your butt down and begin. The Universe favors the bold.
START BEFORE YOU’RE READY
Two of our favorites—Marie Forleo and Steven Pressfield—live by this idea of “start before you’re ready.”
It’s a goodie and a game-changer, especially for those of us who are self-diagnosed perfectionists (🙋🏻🙋🏻) or struggle with Imposter Syndrome.
The scariest part of any comfort-zone-expanding endeavor is almost always the first step.
That point at which we officially hit the ‘start’ button on our exciting-but-fear-inducing idea.
Because of this, there are about a million mind barriers to entry.
Here are some of our favorites:
You need to take X course first.
You need to get X degree first.
You need to get a haircut first. (What? Ok. 💇)
You need to do more research first.
You need to get X equipment first.
You need to consult so-and-so first.
You need X amount of money first.
We’re heading into the holiday season. It’s too busy a time of year. Start later.
You need to design your website first.
You need to map out your life plan first.
ENOUGH. ✋
You will never be 100% ready. Waiting until your mind is “ready” is fear in disguise.
And fear will go to any length to keep you from starting, including pointing out each and every one of your hot-button pain points, flaws, and self-perceived limits. It’s savvy like that.
As we mentioned here, you can’t out-think fear. You’ve got to take action.
Not action in the form of the above list of dream-delayers dressed in semi-productive clothes. Action in the form of a real, fear-facing step in the direction of your dreams.
A step that intentionally expands the bounds of your comfort zone.
Here’s an easy, nearly fail-proof trick to distinguish the dream-delaying actions from the truly important ones and to determine which task to tackle first:
Which task do you keep putting off? Which task do you feel afraid of? Which task seems daunting because it’s full of unknowns?
That’s the one. Do it NOW.
But once you’ve started, then what?
SUCCESS FAVORS THE CONSISTENT
We love a good success story as much as the next gal, but success stories tend to focus only on the beginning (the dream) and end (the outcome) of a story.
They almost always neglect the longest and most important part of the story: the middle.
That’s because the middle isn’t where the shiny, pretty, and broadly appealing parts of the story unfold.
Except for the very rare, luck-induced scenario, the middle portion of every success story looks exactly the same:
Consistency. Of the brave, fear-facing type.
The middle part of every success story is about being consistent. It’s about moving forward in spite of fear—in all its forms, excuses included—and showing up to do the work.
But it’s not as exciting to read about our heroes’ humanity. And so we get the abridged story of success—I dreamed it, I achieved it.
Unfortunately, the abridged version gives us false hope. It leads us to believe that if success doesn’t arrive quickly, then we must be on the wrong path. That our dream isn’t “right” or worth having.
This couldn’t be further from the truth.
Your dream, your calling, the idea that wakes you up at night to remind you it’s still there. Whatever that is for you, is the true north in your outer purpose. Stick with it. That dream is divine guidance funneled into your mind from your soul.
Pause. ✨ Breathe. Wind it back to consistency.
CONSISTENCY IS SCARY
Being consistent sounds easy enough, right? And yet inconsistency kills more dreams than a lack of talent ever will.
So, why is consistency so hard?
FACT: Nothing is scarier than fully committing to whatever it is that’s most important to us.
And being consistent means we’re fully committed. It means we no longer have the excuse of, “Ehh, it’s ok. I didn’t try that hard...” to shield the ego if things don’t go according to plan.
Consistency means we’ve got skin in the game. And when we have skin in the game, we feel intense vulnerability.
Steadfast commitment to your dream means you set aside every naysayer excuse and limiting belief that roams through your mind and instead say:
“Not today, friend. Today, I can. Today, I will take one brave step towards my dream. And I’ll do it again tomorrow. And every day thereafter, because this is the work that lights my soul on fire. And I must do it. Not to achieve success but to expand through my fears. Not for the outcome but for the journey.”
Success doesn’t just favor the consistent. It favors the consistently brave.
It favors those who show up in spite of their excuses, limiting beliefs, and fears.
Keep reading to learn about one of the biggest barriers to consistency...
RESISTANCE TO CONSISTENCE
Have you read The War of Art* by Steven Pressfield?
If you have, then you probably know where this is going.
If you haven’t, add it to your short list of must-read material and keep reading to learn about a little thing called Resistance (yes, with a capital ‘R’).
Steven Pressfield brilliantly defines Resistance as an invisible, morphing energy whose primary goal is to keep each and every human from doing the work that’s most important to them.
Resistance shows up whenever we’re about to do something vital to our soul’s evolution.
To connect this idea to last week’s balloon metaphor, Resistance is the force that will do everything in its power to keep your balloon deflated.
Resistance is broader than fear, but its fuel is fear itself. As such, one of its favorite methods to prevent us from doing the work we love is to prey on our fears.
“Resistance by definition is self-sabotage.” — Steven Pressfield
Pressfield notes that, “Though it feels malevolent, Resistance in fact operates with the indifference of rain and transits the heavens by the same laws as stars.”
And yet, “Its target is the epicenter of our being: our genius, our soul, the unique and priceless gift we were put on this earth to give and that no one else has but us.”
So, despite its indifference, Resistance’s end goal is terrifyingly detrimental to our soul’s evolution and must be stopped.
WHAT RESISTANCE LOOKS LIKE
To combat Resistance, we must first recognize what it looks and feels like.
Undisputed Resistance feels like unhappiness or lack of fulfillment.
Remember the bleh feelings that bubble up when you stay in your comfort zone too long? Apathy, boredom, restlessness, an undercurrent of guilt without an identifiable source? These are symptoms of Resistance, too.
Resistance most commonly takes form as procrastination. Specifically, Pressfield notes:
“Procrastination is the most common manifestation of Resistance because it’s the easiest to rationalize. We don’t tell ourselves, ‘I’m never going to write my symphony.’ Instead we say, ‘I am going to write my symphony; I’m just going to start tomorrow.’”
This 👆 is so painfully true we LOLed when we read it.
THE BOTTOM LINE
Each and every one of us is up against the same forces when it comes to the work we love. We all have fears, we all face Resistance.
“Henry Fonda was still throwing up before each stage performance, even when he was seventy-five. In other words, fear doesn’t go away.” — Steven Pressfield
There’s immense comfort in recognizing we’re not alone in these battles. No one, no matter how experienced or successful, is immune to fear or Resistance.
We may wage the war alone, but we’re all fighting the same fight.
INTENTION
I start before I’m ready and take consistent action towards my exciting-but-fear-inducing idea.
3 RESOURCES
Book: The War of Art* by Steven Pressfield
Podcast Episode: How to Overcome Resistance + Why Talent Doesn’t Matter with Steven Pressfield + Marie Forleo
Article: How to Expand Your Outer Purpose Comfort Zone
*This is an affiliate link. Purchasing through affiliate links helps fund us at no extra cost to you. Thank you for your support!
