How to Find Presence While Persevering
In this article, we tackle a tough question: How can you be present and balanced while consistently showing up to do your most important work? In other words, how can you find that magical, centered space where being meets doing? Keep reading to find out how!
“I do not deny the reality of suffering—not yours, not mine, not humanity’s in general. It is simply that I refuse to fetishize it. I certainly refuse to deliberately seek out suffering in the name of artistic authenticity.”
here’s what you’ll learn from this article:
Learn the difference between presence + avoidance.
Eight tips to find presence and balance while persevering in your most important work.
Our personal examples with this topic.
Let’s get to it!
PAUSE FOR PRESENCE
Based on the feedback we’ve received, this month’s topic on habits has been resonating big time with you.
To honor this, we’re going to carry the theme into December and continue to dive deep into habits.
Since we’re extending the HABITS theme out across two months, we’d like to take this week to pause for presence.
More specifically, we’d like to address a question that’s often shied away from:
How can you be present and balanced while consistently showing up to do your most important work?
In other words, how can you find the magical, centered space where being meets doing?
Far too often, perseverance is presented in an all-or-nothing manner.
Either you’re (1) A Type A workaholic who grinds yourself into the ground without any sense of work-life balance, or (2) A super chill Type B-er with big dreams but little follow-through.
How many times have you read about a super successful person finding balance after major burnout?
It doesn’t have to be this way.
It doesn’t have to be all or nothing, and you don’t have to wait for catastrophic burnout to find ‘the good space’ in the work you love.
But how, exactly, do you enact the regimented habits of a Professional while also staying present, grounded, and balanced?
After all, your primary purpose here on earth is to awaken, your secondary purpose is to bring your gifts into the world in a meaningful way.
And so you’re charged with the difficult task of finding the sweet spot in between—the space where being meets doing.
PRESENCE VS. AVOIDANCE
Picture this scenario…
It’s 2pm and you’re sitting at your desk feeling uninspired and a little sleepy.
There’s an important article you’d planned to share on your website tomorrow, but you haven’t even started writing it.
At this moment, your IGM chimes in and suggests you call it quits for the day and [insert any activity other than your most important].
For the purposes of this example, we’ll say the chosen activity is to take a nap on the couch with Netflix playing in the background.
And so here goes the IGM...
“It’s so much easier to nap than to write,” the IGM says.
“You deserve it. Plus, you’re not feeling inspired, which means you’re not in alignment. Remember, Abraham Hicks says to nap when you find yourself out of the ‘vortex’. Your work can wait. No one will notice you didn’t post,” he follows up.
Gosh, that IGM is clever. 🐵 He’s even using your own spiritual prowess against you to suggest that a nap is the only way back to alignment.
And so, the question becomes: In this instance, is Presence calling it quits and napping or is Presence showing up to do your most important task for the day?
This can be a particularly difficult question to answer for those who are spiritually tapped in.
This is because many of us have come to believe that being Present involves obeying whatever limits the mind suggests we have.
We forget that limiting beliefs and thoughts are a byproduct of the ego // IGM // Resistance, entirely distinct and separate from the deepest desires of our higher self.
And so we falsely believe that being Present involves only working within our limits rather than pushing past them and showing up (even when we don’t feel like it).
In other words, many of us have embraced the false notions that…
Giving in to relax when we’re tired/bored/uninspired is being present (and that denying relaxation in these moments would mean we’re not present).
That Presence and the consistent pursuit of our outer purpose can’t coexist.
That Presence is reserved for downtime, meditation, yoga, etc. and not for our most important work.
We’ve mistakenly come to equate Presence with relaxation and self-compassion to a delusional degree, saying things like:
“I love and respect myself and my limits, so I’m going to take a nap.”
No, no, no. Hold up. ✋
We’d like to shatter this belief right here and now.
In the above scenario, taking a nap isn’t being Present (or self-compassionate, for that matter). Taking a nap is avoiding the task that would truly honor the present moment: writing that darn article.
You can take a nap, but that article will loom overhead. That looming will then seep into and diminish the enjoyment you’ll get out of the nap as well as everything else you’ll do until you write the darn article.
Why?
Because writing the article was exactly what you needed to do to align with the present moment. In avoiding the writing, you also avoided the present moment.
ALRIGHT THEN, BRING ON THE HUSTLE!
The land of extremes. We know where your mind went, because ours went there, too.
The mind loves clear-cut rules. This is because clear-cut rules make decision-making easy and efficient. The brain loves efficiency.
Unfortunately, the mind’s desire for ease and efficiency means we sometimes get stuck with rigid, all-or-nothing beliefs.
Point being: If after reading the above, your mind immediately spewed something along the lines of, “Ok, got it!! I will never nap during work hours again. I will only work during work hours. I will hustle harder than Gary Vaynerchuk,” then you’re in good company.
And also, no, that wasn’t our suggestion. 🙄 Knock it off, mind.
The thing is, though, we can’t tell you exactly what honoring the Present moment looks like for you and your unique outer purpose scenario.
You’ll have to call in a favor to your mind and request that she begin making determinations on a case-by-case basis.
Having said that...
PRESENCE WHILE PERSEVERING
Here are some general guidelines and musings for how to find Presence and work-life balance while you persevere in your most important work:
Do it, don’t avoid it. Whatever soul-derived task looms overhead or nags at your mind is calling you back to Presence.
Eat your frogs first and reward yourself for doing so. Get your most important (and difficult), soul-evolving sh*t done first and then reward yourself with a nap or a fun IGM activity. Not only will you feel accomplished, you’ll also enjoy the reward so much more now that it’s taking place outside of the “Dark Playground”.
Check-in with yourself honestly and often. Ask yourself, “Am I feeling balanced and moving the needle forward on my most important work each day?” Be brutally honest. If the answer is yes, keep doing what you’re doing. If the answer is no, which side of the coin are you on—burnout or complacency? Then, consider what’s standing in your way. Is it fear or limiting beliefs? Amateur habits? Challenge your fears + habits and invoke change where needed.
Turn Pro. It might surprise you, but between the Professional and the Amateur, it’s actually the Amateur who’s most likely to burn herself out. Remember, teetering is exhausting and so is spreading yourself thin and wide. The Professional takes a balanced but highly consistent approach to her most important work. She doesn’t experience decision fatigue because she knows what she’s going to do each day: Show up for her most important sh*t no matter how she feels. She’s also patient and accepts that progress can be steadily chipped away at but never rushed or hustled. The Professional finds soul-fulfilling Presence by going deep on her most important work.
Let Resistance be the guide. Whatever task you feel the most Resistance towards is very likely the exact task you need to do in order to stay Present in your work/life. Persevering in spite of Resistance re-aligns us with the present moment.
Be gentle with your limits, but don’t obey them without question. Listen, none of us want to end up being that popped balloon who’s expanded too quickly and under so much stress that it explodes. Sometimes being present really, truly is taking that nap in the middle of the work day. Many times it’s not. Take time to ask the question: Am I napping to avoid my most important work or am I napping because my soul and body truly need to rest? There’s a big difference between those two answers.
Adopt the trickster frame of mind (à la Liz Gilbert). Have you read Big Magic*? If not, add it to your short list of must-reads. One of our favorite parts in this book is where Liz playfully recommends that creatives adopt a “trickster” mindset. Simply put, the trickster is flexible, cunning, and able to adapt. Mostly importantly though, the trickster trusts in herself, yes, but also in the Universe. There will be moments on your journey towards fulfilling your outer purpose when you have done all you can. At these points, your best bet is to sit back and trust the rest to the care of the Universe.
“A good trickster knows that if he cheerfully tosses a ball out into the cosmos, that ball will be thrown back at him. It might be thrown back really hard, or it might be thrown back really crooked, or it might be thrown back in a cartoonish hail of missiles, or it might not be thrown back until the middle of next year—but that ball will eventually be thrown back. The trickster waits for the ball to return, catches it however it arrives, and then tosses it out there into the void again, just to see what will happen.” — Liz Gilbert
Don’t fetishize suffering. This is another goodie from Big Magic*. Despite the revered brilliance of many well-known sufferers—e.g., artists like Van Gogh and writers like Hemingway—suffering does not equal creativity. These artists’ brilliance was in spite of their suffering, not because of it. Bringing your gifts into the world will be difficult at times. In those instances, learn to accept the challenges that arise as part of the process and nothing more. And remember that persevering through difficulty is distinct from suffering. You’re not required to suffer for your cause or your creativity. Don’t lose touch with Presence by adopting a martyr mindset like so many creatives before you have. If you’re suffering through your most important work, this is a strong indication that something’s gone awry. Likely, you’ve pinched yourself off from the loving guidance of your higher self and the Universe.
MAKE IT REAL
Ashley’s Example
“Of all the creative endeavors I tackle on a regular basis, food photography is the most likely to elicit Resistance.
It wasn’t always like this, but the process of photographing all 100+ recipes for my cookbook transformed what was once my favorite part of the recipe development process into my most Resisted part.
Let me take you back to June 2015…
I’d been recipe testing all spring and had planned to photograph as many of the 100+ cookbook recipes as I could over the summer. I worked as a psychologist in the public school system at the time, and so I had summers off. Excellent perk and perfect for leveraging that lengthy summer daylight to get the photos I needed.
Leading up to the summer, I planned and planned and planned. I overhauled my prop collection. I created huge calendars on poster boards to map out when I’d photograph each and every recipe. I researched how other cookbook authors tackled the process. I took notes.
Point being: I was more than prepared to tackle this photography project.
But when the first shoot day rolled around, I was terrified. I felt an intense, looming pressure and some of the worst Resistance I’ve ever encountered. And so I dawdled and dawdled and dawdled and eventually napped.
I’d planned to photograph 10 recipes per week—a challenge for certain but also totally do-able if I stuck to my two-a-day plan.
Three weeks into the process, and I’d only shot three recipes total. I should have photographed 30 by this point. Instead of hunkering down and photographing, I’d done anything and everything else.
I napped in the name of self-care (it wasn’t really—it was avoidance). I conducted more photography research in the name of… well, research (more avoidance). I planned date nights for Dan and myself (more avoidance). I scrubbed the bathroom floor grout with a toothbrush (WTF, definitely more avoidance). I reorganized my office. I shopped for more props.
I told myself all of this was in the name of self-care and preparedness. It wasn’t. It was all avoidance. How do I know this? Because the longer I carried on like this, the more miserable and self-loathing I felt.
Had all this truly been for the sake of self-care and preparedness, I would have felt more balanced and more prepared. Instead, I felt totally out of control.
I also felt completely of touch with the Present moment. I feared the weeks to come and regretted the weeks that had already passed.
I’d mistakenly handed the reins to the IGM. That little dude was running the show, and he didn’t give two hoots about my most important work. He’d even weaponized “self-care” against me, labeling his own cheap thrills as being in the name of caring for myself.
I’d like to say that I was able to right the ship sooner rather than later, but it took a solid five weeks of this creative misery before there was any change at all. It also took a tearful meltdown and Dan intervening with his expert project management guidance to get me back on track.
At the time, I didn’t realize that there was a name for what I was up against. In hindsight, it’s easy to see it was Resistance, the IGM, etc. But most of all, it was fear. Fear of not being good enough.
Interestingly, once I found a groove in the process and showed up no matter how I felt, I found peace, inspiration, and Presence, too.
To this day, food photography continues to be my most persistent Resistance trigger. And yet, once I take real, honest action towards it, the fear dissipates and Presence emerges.
Ironically, photography is one of the most rewarding creative endeavors I regularly tackle, and yet it’s also the one I regularly want to avoid. Go figure.”
INTENTION
I honor Presence while pursuing my calling. I recognize that my sense of Presence is a morphing energy unique to me, and so I check-in with myself regularly in order to meet Presence where it’s at.
3 RESOURCES
Book: Big Magic* by Liz Gilbert
Book: The War of Art* by Steven Pressfield
Article: How to Create Life Balance Between Dreams and Habits by Wayne Dyer
*This is an affiliate link. Purchasing through affiliate links helps fund us at no extra cost to you. Thank you for your support!
