How to Be Present in a Modern, Distracted World
The more advanced our world becomes, the more difficult it is to stay present. Between texts, TV, phone apps, video games, social media, and so on, there are more ways than ever to yank our awareness out of the present moment. Keep reading to find out how to be present in a modern, distracted world.
“The miracle of love comes to you in the presence of the uninterpreted moment. If you are mentally somewhere else, you miss real life.”
Here’s what you’ll learn from this article:
How modern distractions deter presence.
Why our minds are (literally) addicted to distraction.
How to use “temptation bundling” to build boundaries around distractions.
Let’s get to it!
PRESENCE IN THE FACE OF DISTRACTION
The more advanced our world becomes, the more difficult it is to stay present.
Which is why it’s more important than ever to set the intention of presence and draw our awareness to it.
Between texts, TV, phone apps, video games, social media, and so on, there are more ways than ever to yank our awareness out of the present moment.
If we allow this river of distractions to carry us along, it will tow us downstream until the hours become days, the days become weeks, and the weeks become years.
Before we know it, the river of distractions becomes our reality, and we move through it unconsciously as it drowns out our sense of presence.
So, how do we find our way back to dry, present land?
How do we build boundaries around distractions so that we can use them consciously?
Before we answer this, let’s take a look at the psychology behind why our brains are so addicted to distraction in the first place.
Because, as the fundamental rule of Behaviorism suggests: Every behavior serves a purpose.
And it helps to first understand why we’re doing something if we want to know how to stop or modify said behavior.
ADDICTED TO DISTRACTION
Dopamine. We’re just gonna drop that right there… 💭 ✨
Dopamine is at the heart of the brain’s reward system, and it’s the driving force behind motivation, addiction, and many other neurological processes.
All of the modern distractions mentioned above are designed to release a surge of dopamine and encourage the formation of addictive habits.
Let’s not assign value to the word “addictive” but rather take a closer look at how and why addictive habits are formed.
HABIT FORMATION
According to James Clear in Atomic Habits*, “all habits proceed through four stages in the same order: cue, craving, response, and reward.”
The cue acts as a trigger that encourages your brain to initiate a behavior and is directly tied to reward prediction.
As Clear outlines, “Because the cue is the first indication that we’re close to a reward, it naturally leads to a craving.”
The craving is the motivational force behind every habit. “What you crave is not the habit itself but the change in state it delivers.” — James Clear, Atomic Habits p. 48
The response is the actual habit or behavior you perform.
The reward—which activates the brain’s reward system and delivers a dopamine hit—is the end goal of every habit.
A behavior must be sufficient in all four stages or it won’t become a habit.
In Clear’s words:
“Eliminate the cue and your habit will never start. Reduce the craving and you won’t experience enough motivation to act. Make the behavior difficult and you won’t be able to do it. And if the reward fails to satisfy your desire, then you’ll have no reason to do it again in the future.”
For the intents and purposes of the modern distractions we’re discussing here, we can broadly assume they all offer a satisfying reward.
Why?
As mentioned above, they’re designed to be highly satisfying (read: they’re designed to activate the brain’s reward system/release a surge of dopamine).
The key here though is that dopamine isn’t just released when you experience the reward. Dopamine is released at the mere anticipation of the reward.
This is so important that we’ll say it again another way:
If you predict a behavior will be rewarding, your dopamine levels spike in anticipation. When dopamine rises, so does the motivation to act.
It’s the anticipation of a reward that motivates us.
Even more interesting, our brains have more neural circuitry allocated to wanting rewards than for actually liking them.
And thus, it’s the anticipation of the reward that drives behavior because it’s even more rewarding to our brains (oh heyyy, dopamine spike) than the reward itself.
And so why can’t we stop clicking in to our distractions of choice (e.g., Instagram, Facebook, the news, reality TV, etc.)?
Since we’ve reaped their rewards in the past, the mere thought of these things releases dopamine, and dopamine inspires us to act.
Knowledge is power.
Now that we understand how the brain works, we can use conscious awareness to override its reward-seeking ways and move back into alignment with the present moment.
NOT ALL BAD
Quick clarification: We’re not saying distractions are “bad”.
We’re not here to judge or decipher the worthiness of anything you choose to do or not do.
Our point in sharing all this is to encourage you to thoughtfully evaluate how distractions exist in your own life so that you can—if you’d like to—make the changes necessary to align more closely with the present moment.
With that in mind, if you’d like our two cents on how to infuse your days with a bit more presence (and a bit less distraction), keep reading.
BUILDING BOUNDARIES WITH TEMPTATION BUNDLING
When it comes to modern distractions, we’re all about building boundaries and using our understanding of the brain’s reward system to “hack” the way we behave.
Have you heard of Premack’s Principle?
It’s the psychological principle that asserts that “more probable behaviors will reinforce less probable behaviors.”
We already know that behaviors involving modern distractions like video games, phone apps, social media, TV, texting, etc. are (highly) probable. Right?
Right.
Well, let’s use that probability to our advantage.
With what James Clear refers to as “temptation bundling”, we can use the performance of less probable behaviors (read: less rewarding) as keys to unlock access to highly probable behaviors.
i.e., After [HABIT I NEED], I will [HABIT I WANT]
Here’s the real magic: We can use temptation bundling to specifically encourage behaviors that promote presence.
Here are some examples:
After I practice yoga, I will check Instagram.
After I meditate for 10 minutes, I will watch an episode of my favorite Youtube show.
After I write down 5 things I’m grateful for, I will check Facebook.
After I read 15 pages of [insert spiritual book], I will enjoy a glass of wine.
After I take a walk in nature, I will check my phone.
Bottom line: Doing the thing you need to (or hope to) do means you get to do the thing you want to do.
When it comes to spiritual practices, we’ve found that, with repetition, the need-to-do’s eventually become the want-to-do’s because they add so much joy, peace, and presence to our lives.
It’s just that their immediate rewards aren’t as potent as that of modern distractions, and so it helps to link the two together until the new habit is formed.
Note: If you like this bit on temptation bundling, be sure to checkout Francesca’s in-depth, thorough article on habits here.
INTENTION
I build boundaries around distractions to make space for the present moment.
2 RESOURCES
*This is an affiliate link. Purchasing through affiliate links helps fund us at no extra cost to you. Thank you for your support!
